The Ultimate Skill e-Newsletter
By Mike Lipkin
Breathe the Zeitgeist!
Be a part of the world. Don't be apart from the world.
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Say it. Say "Zeitgeist" aloud. How does it sound? Notice what you do with your face. You smile. You feel the excitement even though you may not understand why. There's something exotic and electric to the word. That's because it's an expression of our world. Yours and mine.
"Zeit" is the German word for "Time" and "Geist" is the German word for "Spirit". So Zeitgeist literally means "Spirit of The Times". And the word "Spirit" comes from the Latin word ‘Spiritus" which means breath.
If you breathe the Zeitgeist, it means you're absorbing the spirit of the times. It means you get it. You see the bigger picture. You comprehend your context. You get the what, the why and the how of transformation. You get the pattern as the dots appear. You get it before others get it. You act before others act. You talk before others talk. You are the Go-To person when it comes to understanding today and anticipating tomorrow.
Context is everything. Literally. It's the environment in which we live. It's the life that surrounds us. It's the people around us. It's the cultural norms that guide us. It's the social connections that bind us. It's the raw material of our thoughts. It's the parameters of our vision.
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The question is: can you see the context that defines yourself and others?
Or are you like a fish in the sea? It's in the sea but it doesn't know that it's in the sea. It's unaware that it's unaware. If you're unaware of the context in which you live, you cannot understand the implications of your thoughts and actions. You cannot grasp the significance of the events around you. You cannot read the signs that point to new directions.
In essence, if you cannot see the context from where you come, you cannot see where you're going. You're flying blind. You don't even know what you're crashing into. As importantly, you're of little value to the people around you. In fact, you may even be detrimental to their health. If they're relying on your judgment, they're going to make poor decisions that will lead to poor futures.
"Context Consciousness" is the difference between being in control and being confused. It's the difference between effectiveness and inertia. I see it all the time. People who breathe the Zeitgeist handle the disruptions, surprises and volatility that characterize Normal 2.0. They understand the Age of Linearity is over. It's been replaced by the Age of Sudden Discontinuity. Past performance is no longer an indication of future success. It's all new in the blink-of-an-eye.
Think of a recent comedy-movie you watched. Think about how you felt while you were watching it. Now think of a recent drama you watched. Think about how you felt. Now think of a horror movie you may have watched. Think about how you felt. What's my point? Life is like any one of those movies. It's your "Context Consciousness" that determines what you believe you're experiencing and what you're feeling. In my case, just so you know, life is a comic book drama. It's Superman, Batman, Spiderman and Lord of The Rings all rolled into one. And I'm a cross between Gandalf, Peter Parker and Bruce Wayne. In my own mind, I am a super-hero on a mission to empower you with The Ultimate Skill.
John Milton, the 17th century English poet, said, "The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven." That's the power of Context Consciousness. If you have it, you make a heaven of any hell. If you don't, you create hell, not just for you but the people around you. And they will reciprocate by leaving you so you'll be alone.
Trying to motivate someone without Context Consciousness to transform themselves is like talking to me in Russian. They're not going to understand a word you're saying. They're not going to shift their point of view. And they're not going to act. The truth is many people have made the decision to close themselves off to the Zeitgeist. They'd rather die than change because they think it's the easier option. I'm serious. How many people do you know who cannot see what is staring right at them? It always amazes me how people can rationalize any reality so it fits their view of the way things should be, even when it doesn't. Then they become victims. Then they become angry. Then they become unworkable. They they're gone. Ignorance isn't bliss. It's fatal.
On the other hand, think about the people in your organization who help others thrive, not just survive. Aren't they the ones relishing the drama of transformation? Aren't they the ones who seem to have a sixth sense of how to handle all the newness coming at them? When they talk, don't they seem to have an inside view of the future? Don't they seem to have an assurance about them? Even when they're wrong, don't they recover rapidly? Don't they have an aura of optimism about them?
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Think about the most valuable people in your life.
Aren't they the ones who help you see things you couldn't see on your own? Aren't they the ones who give you the perspective that delivers the solutions to problems that were previously unsolvable? Aren't they the ones who always seem to be connected to what's going on? Isn't it reassuring just having them around you?
You know you're in the presence of a Zeitgeist-Meister when you hear yourself or others say the following words: I didn't know that; I never looked at it that way; Now it all makes sense; Of course! Now I get it; So it's not just me, it's everyone; Now I finally understand why; Now I see how it all works; So that's the direction we should move in; AHA, that's where the real opportunities are…
I know I've made a difference when I earn the "AHA" from the other person or my delegates. I see the light go on. I hear their exclamation of delighted surprise. I feel their breakthrough. I sense their shift in energy. As I help them make the connection, I connect with them. It's a beautiful thing. It's instant bonding. It's the antidote to same-old-same-old. It's the key to the next level of conversation.
Pause.
Take a deep breath. Hold it. Breathe out.
I want you to really get this next Lipkinism. It's a big one, maybe the biggest learning of the entire program. If this Lipkinism is all you take away from this game, you've won:
The quality of your future is a direct function of the quality of conversations you have with the people in your life. And the quality of your conversations is a direct function of your awareness, understanding, integration, and translation of the Zeitgeist. Extraordinary relationships are created one extraordinary conversation at a time.
Every time you have a conversation with someone, you impact their emotional and mental state. Think about it. Every interaction with someone either elevates him or relegates him. What do your interactions do to others? Are you lifting them up? Are you bringing them down? Or are you net neutral?
So think about the quality of your conversations. Are they just ordinary? Like most conversations that most people have with each other. Are they merely repetitions of previous conversations? Are they just yackety yack? Are they delivered automatically? Is one just like the other? As you talk, are you thinking "I've heard these words so many times before?" In fact, are you tired of your own dialogue? Are you like a conversational assembly line? Do you almost call out "Next" before the next conversation?
Or are you bringing something extra? Are you consciously enriching your conversations with new insights, possibilities and connections? As you talk, are you aware of how your talking is being heard by the listener? Do your words rise above the noise of their everyday lives? Are you mindful of your responsibility to the other person? Are they being empowered by your words?
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We've all been at the receiving end of a telemarketing call. We shake our heads and even smile to ourselves as we listen to the scripted, monotonous voice intruding on us. If it's something we're interested in, we listen grudgingly as we wait for the offer. If not, we hang up immediately. But how different are your conversations with the people in your life? Do you see your conversations as inescapable necessities? Or do you view them as everyday gifts that must be honored accordingly? How do you sound to others? Engaged and invested? Or mechanical and absent?
Every time, I have the privilege of a live person either on the phone or in front of me, I'm extremely sensitive to the debt I owe them. They're giving me a moment of their life. In return, I want to earn the right for more moments. I want to give them distinctions that will expand all the moments that follow. This aspiration is not as grandiose as it may sound at first. Sometimes a single phrase or truth can impact people forever. In fact, I guarantee you that your life has been shaped by statements made to you from your earliest age until today. Sticks and stones can break our bones, but words can transform us. A single sentence can become a life sentence. If other people have that power over you, think about the power you have over others. Use it well.
I'm continually amazed how astonished people are when I play full out in my conversations.
They're stunned by my commitment to the conversation – especially if it's someone I don't even know. I hear their intake of breath or pause over the phone, followed by an appreciative comment. I see the smile on the faces of people in front of me. I experience their shift in mood as they get my intention and insights. In return, I feel the pleasure of my contribution to them. And that escalates my delivery to an even higher level, they respond accordingly and the virtuous momentum keeps building.
Here's another Lipkinism: The primary filter through which other people process your words is "What does this mean to me?" Your words will be deposited into one of three categories: 1. They don't mean anything – therefore do nothing. 2. They are a threat –therefore run away. 3. They are an opportunity – therefore run towards it.
Which category do your words fall into? The greater the proportion of your words that fall into the 3rd category, the greater your influence will be on the people around you. If your words mean nothing, or they're threatening, all communication breaks down.
So how do we maximize the meaning that our words have for others? Through the Four Messengers of The Zeitgeist: Awareness, Understanding, Integration, and Translation.
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Messenger One - Awareness:
Awareness is the key to Breathing The Zeitgeist. If you're unaware, you can't even play the game. You're disqualified at the start. You can't even enter the conversation. You're barred from the inner circle. The moment people sense that you're not plugged in, they'll check out. You become just another expression of ordinariness. And I have a sense that if you're still hanging with me at this stage, that's not what you want to be, especially when it's never been easier to avoid.
It's paradoxical: we have so many access points to information that we're overwhelmed. We raise our mental firewalls in case we catch a virus. We cocoon ourselves in our own bubbles so we can protect ourselves against the outside. But the outside IS our world. What's going on beyond the walls of our mind or our home, defines our mind and our home. The world out there is the source of our power. It's where we spend more than half of our waking moments, so open your eyes. Open your ears. Open your mind. Suck it all in. Trust your ability to deal with it. You'll never be given anything you can't handle.
I choose to focus on what I know will expand my ability to see and hear things I definitely need to see and hear. We all have only so much mental bandwidth. Being aware doesn't mean letting in all the environmental spam. It means focusing on those things that will give us the context from which we can develop the awareness, understanding, integration and translation of The Zeitgeist.
Today you will probably eat the foods you usually eat, when you usually eat them. But what media will you consume? How will you nourish your awareness of your environment? What will you watch? What will you listen to? Who will you speak to? What kind of mental diet are you on?
In my case, I scan the Wall Street Journal, The Globe and Mail, USA Today and the New York Times every morning. I have always had a passion for newspapers. I marvel at their ability to produce such a comprehensive publication every day.
Every evening, I download free podcasts from iTunes. These podcasts include: 60 Minutes, Ad Age, Barnes & Noble, BBC, Businessweek, Newsweek, Commonwealth Club Radio Program, Discovery Channel, Time Magazine, Harvard Business Review, Wharton Business School, and The Economist. There are many more but these are my favourites.
I am fascinated by the democratization of information. We all have the ability to listen to some of the most insightful voices of our time whenever we want. For the price of an iPod, you can plug yourself into a series of extraordinary conversations alerting you to the defining issues – both local and global. And if you love listening to eloquent commentators and skilled orators like I do, raising your awareness can be a highly pleasurable activity. It's also one that you can engage in while you do other things. So while I'm cycling, walking or taking the train to work, I'm also feeding my mind. It's a beautiful thought.
I'm also continually exposed to the Environics Social Values Research which plugs me into evolution at the cultural and social level. The trends I'm about to share with you are sourced partially from the Environics data.
Ten or fifteen times a day, I talk to "Connoisseurs of The Zeitgeist". These are people who are acknowledged authorities in their fields. I ask them for their point of view because I know it will enhance mine.
I've designed my life so that I meet and work with a wide diversity of people every day. It's the breadth of my contacts that broadens my awareness. I have so many outstanding conversations with so many outstanding people that my life is one long intellectual feast. But that's my job: I am an awareness-raiser. I am what I live. I live to talk, listen, learn and coach. What do you live to do?
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Messenger Two: Understanding
Once you're aware of the forces transforming your world, you can begin to understand them. Everything is always happening at two levels: the level that's visible to you, and the level beyond that. It's like the surface of the sea, and then everything beneath it. You need to decide how deep you want to go. Remember this next Lipkinism:
Know something about everything and everything about something.
I don't try to understand everything I'm aware of. That would be a one-way ticket to burn-out. But I do want to understand everything I can about the space that I own. That's one of the main reasons I'm creating this program. Every word takes me a little deeper into my space. As I open up The Ultimate Skill for you, I open it up for myself.
Awareness can be achieved instantly, understanding can take a lot longer. Some of my most powerful breakthroughs only come after a prolonged wrestling match with an issue. Understanding is a prize that goes to those with tenacity and stamina. I work with many people who are "early settlers" – they accept the first solution that presents itself to them. They never get beyond the surface. So you hear the shallowness of their words. And it's made worse because they don't know that. They're not prepared to do the work, so they don't get the rewards. And by the way, the more work you do, the more conditioned your mental muscles become. The more likely you are to truly "get it". The more valuable you become to the people around you. The more kudos you earn. And the more success you enjoy. It's called "living in the Sweet Spot".
Understanding is also an interactive process. Other people allow you to look into yourself. In fact, delegates often define me as a mirror that reflects back at them what they are. Until you can explain it to others, you do not understand it. If they don't get it, neither do you.
The ultimate level of understanding is when you get something at an instinctive level. It's migrated from your head to your gut. You know what it is and why it is. You also know why it will benefit others and how to communicate it to them so that they want it. This level of understanding is a gift that appears when you're ready to receive it. And that may not always be when you think you're ready to receive it. There are many times when I believe I've done everything I can to truly "get it" and it still doesn't come to me. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, when I least expect it, I get it. I've learnt that just like every other living thing, understanding needs to gestate within you. It runs its own course. It cannot be rushed. It will come out when it's ready. And that's when you will be.
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Messenger Three: Integration
Integration is on the far side of awareness and understanding. It's when you are a part of your world. You are not apart from your world. It's when you and your world become organized into a coordinated, harmonious whole.
Integration is the consequence of repeated actions to the point of habit, but not to the point of numbness, fatigue or cynicism. It's developed one thought, one conversation, one action, one lesson, one distinction at a time. It's being open to everything because everything is an opening to everything else.
Integration is when you accept what you understand. It's when being in sync with your world is your natural position. Wherever you are is a space you can work in. You absorb your environment by osmosis. People are attracted to you because you are so workable. You create new possibilities even under the most challenging circumstances. You know things are the way they are because, at that moment, that's the way they are. And you're totally ok with that. You can influence where they go next, but you do it with ease and acceptance, not force and frustration.
Integration with the Zeitgeist is a precondition for personal happiness. It's an internal equilibrium that sustains your balance irrespective of external volatility. It's what allows you to dance not fight with life. People who are integrated with the Zeitgeist partner with their circumstances, colleagues and clients to consistently produce remarkable results.
The toughest part about Integration, however, is not what you have to take on. It's what you have to let go. It's getting rid of what gets in the way. It's the ultimate test of your ability to apply your Awareness and Understanding. So here's my question: do you have the courage to discard what may have taken a lifetime to develop?
Often, I'll see delegates bring themselves to the brink of the breakthrough. They have both the Awareness and the Understanding. But they're too attached to their beliefs about right and wrong. They stop at the threshold of the next level because they cannot relinquish their past. You know these people. They're the people in your company who've been there the longest time. They're the keepers of the institutional memory. But they cannot let go of where they've been to get to where they need to be. And when you challenge them on the subject, they provide you with all the reasons why they're right. They may well be. But the Zeitgeist has changed. They haven't. They don't integrate. They get left behind. Experience is their ultimate liability.
Integration requires integrity. Whenever I'm confronted by people who are blocked, I know they know they should change. But they are not authentic with themselves. They're scared to change. Or they're intellectually lazy. So they take a position and it becomes their sticking point. They tell themselves a story about why they shouldn't move on. Then the story becomes their reality – a sad one. When you're with these people, don't give up on them. And don't be frustrated by them. Keep chipping away at their reality. One day it will crack, and an extraordinary person will emerge.
See your world through the eyes of an immigrant. An immigrant is a person, plant or animal that successfully establishes itself in an area where it previously did not exist. It becomes whatever it needs to be. Its past is subservient to its present. Whatever came before is merely preparation for what's coming next. Look at the successful immigrants around you. They've embraced their new reality with such gusto; they often become more native than the natives. They define the real meaning of Integration. As an immigrant Canadian, I proudly declare myself to be part of that clan.
T.S. Eliot expressed the spirit of Integration as follows:
We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.
"Little Gidding" (the last of his Four Quartets)
Despite everything that we've been through, we need to look at our world every day as though we're seeing it for the first time. No matter where you were born, you're an immigrant in the future. And the future is being created now.
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Messenger Four: Translation
At 9am on December 15, 2006, I stood in front of 500 business leaders in Kiev, Ukraine. I was brought there by a seminar company called Rich Strategy. My mandate was to coach delegates on how to communicate, collaborate and motivate their stakeholders to perform at their highest level.
As I spoke, my words were simultaneously translated into Ukrainian. When delegates spoke to me, their words were simultaneously translated into English. It was the two translators sitting at the back of the room who made it possible for any communication to happen at all. For the first 30 minutes it felt strange. Then it became my new normal. I had to slow down my delivery. I couldn't rely on clever humor or verbal sleight of hand. I had to communicate my points with clarity and simplicity. The translators became my partners.
What's the moral of the story? You and I are translators of The Zeitgeist. We can be masters of Awareness, Understanding and Integration, but if we cannot translate our insights into the other person's language, it's all for naught.
How many times have you listened to someone who was speaking your native tongue but they were not speaking your language? They seemed smart and their points seemed valid, but they made no connection with you. They weren't translating their learning into your learning.
Right now, I want you to see every situation with every person as a Micro-Zeitgeist where you need to develop your awareness, understanding and integration.
That requires preparation and openness. But it also requires a conscious love for the ones you're with. And you need to keep telling them how much you love them. Everyone wants to hear how much you respect, admire and appreciate them. Mother Theresa said, "There is a greater hunger for appreciation in the world than there is for bread." And remember Van Morrison's poignant reminder: "Have I told you lately that I love you?"
Think about your next meeting with a colleague or customer. Think about how you can help them Breathe The Zeitgeist. Think about the language they speak. Think about how much you enjoy being with this person. Think about how lucky you are to be given their time. Think about how you can communicate your love for them in an appropriate way. Then think about the actual words you'll use to translate the Zeitgeist so they get it. Then think about the feelings of accomplishment and contribution you'll feel. Then go do it. And let me know how it goes.
Every time I get in front of an audience, I go through a seven step ritual:
1. I find out their biggest issues
2. I get a sense of their language and culture
3. I find common ground that connects us together
4. I tell them how much I respect and admire them
5. I tell them how I'm going to make them successful
6. I tell them how much I enjoy being with them
7. I deliver on my promises
In the Ukraine, for example, the biggest issue was the massive transformation of a country from a socialist past into a capitalist future, while dealing with a volatile neighbour called Russia who is still trying to exert its control. The common ground I established was both our past and our future. I told them that we had common ancestry - my grandfather was from a neighboring state, Lithuania. And our futures were intertwined because we were both striving to be world-class so we could thrive in a global market. That's the common ground I established with them that became the foundation of my program.
Before we move on, I have another question: have you ever watched late night TV Talk Shows? Are you a fan of Letterman, Leno or O'Brien? Have you noticed how much of their show is dependent on events that happened that day? Both the talkshow hosts and their staffs have to be aware of events around them, they have to understand them and integrate them into their dialogue, and then they have to translate them into humour. Whether you like their humour is not my point. My point is that all of us are versions of Letterman, Leno or O'Brien. Our lives are our talkshows. Our dialogue is the conversations we have with people everyday. We have to be compelling and relevant. So the next time you can't sleep, watch the late night talk shows through a different filter. And raise your ratings during the everyday daytime talk show of your own.
- Mike Lipkin
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